|Just a lil' something new.|
CallingSo this is what it feels like.Calling by Jshei
It's not failure, no. It's a blackness that wells up from the depths of somewhere unknown inside of you, gripping your gut and your heart and squeezing so hard that you struggle for breath. It's a gaping hole ripped in a part of you that you didn't know you had, not until it happened.
Not until it happened.
How do you tell yourself to keep going?
Even the thought slows your mind to stagnation and all I want to do is sit there at the edge of that stagnant lake and watch the flies buzz.
But something inside is still calling.
Yearning for the death of logic and the purge of memory and for all the goddamn statisticians in the world to shut their damn mouths.
And you're afraid you'll succumb to the yearning and try again.
Afraid of the statistics. The failure that hasn't happened yet.
But it's the chance that it will that it will
That drives one mad.
Come sit with me by this dead lake.
Dip your toes in.&